


Raspberries and Butt Plugs

by Living_Free



Series: Winchester Luck [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Fluff, Humor, I apologize for nothing, Kinks, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-06
Updated: 2015-07-06
Packaged: 2018-04-07 23:46:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4282569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Living_Free/pseuds/Living_Free





	Raspberries and Butt Plugs

Another day, another batch of souls to condemn. 

Lucifer heaved a sigh and made to rise from his plush memory foam mattress, but was forced back down by a slim, tanned, arm across his waist. He looked over to see Balthazar earnestly slithering over to cuddle with him. Lucifer smiled and picked his lover up bridal style and headed to the washroom, eager to proceed with acts more intense than a mere cuddling session. It had been a good idea to install that jaccuzi in lieu of a tub. He should probably reward the architect once he got off the rack. 

Balthazar had fully awakened by now and was prepping himself, making quite a show of it as well. Sneaky, sexy, thing. Lucifer decided that he should probably punish his naughty lover with a good spanking, followed by a proper pounding. Heh. Lucifer was making his way down Balthazar's overly sensitive back with his mouth when a voice sounded from the bedroom.  
"My Liege! My Liege's Consort! The new batch is here for you," The disembodied voice sing-singed.

Lucifer groaned in disappointment. Curse that overzealous demon. Curse his job. Curse his soul. Oh wait, he'd already done that. Balthazar wriggled underneath him and moaned in distress. "Just do it, love! Hard and fast, I know you want to!" He gasped.

Lucifer grinned in a feral manner as he reached down to grip Balthazar tightly, making the Angel jump and rock into his hand. Lucifer nibbled on his consort's ear as he whispered lowly, "Naughty things like you don't get to give orders, pet. That's just earned you a punishment." 

Beneath him, Balthazar wriggled in excitement. This was shaping up to be a good day after all. 

:::::::::::::

"Next!"

Balthazar lounged in his chair in an attempt to get comfortable. It was quite a task, what with the vibrating plug Lucifer had inserted. "Bad boys deserve to be punished," he had growled, biting into the soft flesh of his thigh. Balthazar suppressed a shudder of arousal at the memory. 

His personal assistant, Morris, led in a shackle soul and retreated respectfully. The soul was shuddering in fright, as Balthazar used his grace to look into the soul. A wife beater, and an animal abuser to boot. Balthazar's pure grace recoiled in disgust. He'd used a crossroads demon to make the woman fall in love with him and marry her.

"An angel! Yeah, I did something right to get to Heaven. Suck it, demons!" The revolting soul was fist pumping in joy. Balthazar smiled. He would take great pleasure in tearing this one down.

"Tom Jacob Briggs. You pathetic sod." The soul, Tom, stopped dancing around and stared, shocked. "While it is true that I am an angel, I am also the Angel of Irony. Ironically for you, I am the Angel who is damning your flabby arse to hell. Fifth layer, please, Morris," Balthazar dismissed the gaping soul as Morris gleefully dragged him away. Morris did love going to the fifth level of hell, it was where all the hellhounds and their pups were kept. Sweet, sweet, irony. 

Balthazar was granted a little reprieve before Lucifer came to fetch him at the end of the day. He reached out to Castiel, who was feeding Eli, who had graduate from his nipple to mashed bananas now. 

"Ba!"

"Good evening, my little chicklet. Are you causing trouble for your father?"

"Good evening, Balthazar. You should update your roster, I smote two demons today. They were attempting to ambush Sam as he slew another one. Eli smote his first demon yesterday. Dean was so proud, I thought he would burst."

Balthazar chuckled. Good old Dean. Even though the brothers and Cas had resumed hunting, they still managed to sit down at the bend of the day as a family and the couple managed to fall in love all over again, every night. Sam had raised the topic of moving out, but was quickly silenced by a look from Cas, and Dean grabbing him by the face and making him swear not to make him worry like that. So for the time being, Sam was stuck with his lactating brother-in-law, bite sized nephew, and menopausal brother. 

Lucifer came in and Balthazar severed the connection with Castiel with a cheery "Ta, love!" He linked arms with his husband and hurried to their chambers, eager to replace the plug with something more organic, and attached to Lucifer. Balthazar turned the picture of Eli and Castiel on the wall around, so that he could be utterly filthy without feeling like a cad. The pair were fondling each other as they approached the bedroom when they stopped, picking up on a rustling inside the chamber. Lucifer froze, and he quietly inched forward, while Balthazar pulled out his blade. The door was flung open, only to reveal a nice bum leaning over the bed to get to the dresser. The couple smiled at each other, having identified the rather shapely bum as belonging to Michael. 

"Eek!"

"Michael, what are you doing?" Lucifer asked curiously. It was not like his brother to pop in unannounced.

Michael drew himself up in a stately manner. "Good evening, brother. I wished only to see you and Balthazar, nothing else, I had no other intentions whatsoever," he said, completely unconvincingly. "Adam is thinking of gathering the family on Eli's first birthday, and I decided to come by to invite-"

"Is that my raspberry lube?" Balthazar cut in incredulously.

Michael froze, eyes wide. "NO! It's... it's blood!" Michael blustered.

"In a bottle? Michael that was pathetic," Lucifer simpered. "So you're the one who's been stealing our lube for the past month! Mikey, you kinky minx! I wouldn't have guessed!"

Michael let out a garbled shriek and vanished, dropping the bottle in his haste. Lucifer chuckled. "At least we know what to give Adam on his birthday," he said. 

Balthazar turned to him with a pout, and said, "You forgot about my treat already, love?"

Lucifer's eyes gleamed with barely concealed arousal. "Never, my lovely consort. You'll get your present just as soon as you've unwrapped it," Lucifer growled.

Balthazar grinned. What a perfect day.


End file.
